[ oh, it's definitely missed. but it probably is a good thing, that arthur completely misses it, or he might be a lot less willing to let max touch him like he's currently doing. mostly, arthur just stares at him like he's not quite sure what's going on (he isn't quite sure what's going on), but he lets max do as he pleases, because ... well, if it's part of a test, he should let him do it. he did ask, didn't he? how max knew. there's part of him that feels he's being made a fool of, right around the time max moves his face to and fro, but then -- ]
[ things change, abruptly, and max is much closer than arthur expected, and he's touching him in ways he's never allowed anyone to touch him before. not even merlin would ever cross this line (though there have been times when he's been close, a hand smoothing arthur's shirt, fingers brushing through his hair during other nightly rituals, but there always remains a line, invisible and uncrossable). max isn't merlin, of course. what was he thinking? ]
[ it happens so fast arthur isn't even sure what he's supposed to do. which isn't to say he's unaccustomed to being kissed, but -- well, yes, one might say that he is. he's only ever kissed gwen, and it wasn't like this. it felt different, calmer, less like a fire in gut and more like being awoken from a pleasant dream. he's not entirely sure what that means. so he stands there, awkwardly stiff, his mouth only parting slightly near the end, when his brain finally catches up to the rest of him. he wouldn't really consider it kissing back. more like ... gaping in the middle of being kissed. ]
[ which is exactly his expression when max pulls away and goes back to looking at the lemurs. did he like it? he has no idea. he's still processing the fact that it happened at all. he can't even decide if he's mad or not. he still doesn't look at the lemurs, too busy staring bemusedly at max. he's probably never going to understand this. ]
You kissed me. [ thankfully, he sounds more incredulous than angry. and yes, it's obvious, but it's helping him process. sort of. saying it out loud makes it seem more real than it felt. he's just trying to work through this, and his mind is only full of an incoherent jumble of thoughts, mostly involving what it would be like to kiss merlin (and wondering why he's even thinking about that in the first place), so aloud is working better for him. ]
[ he hesitates for a moment, but then his voice goes slightly softer, almost as if he's ashamed, though he doesn't know what for. maybe just because ... he hasn't thought of gwen much, lately. since when did merlin become the forefront of his mind? arthur wonders if maybe he always was and gwen was simply a distraction. he hates to think of her like that. ] It was different than kissing Gwen. [ because he's going to be stuck on this kissing thing for a while. is that normal??? shouldn't kissing just be the same with anyone??? tell him these secrets, max. ]
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[ things change, abruptly, and max is much closer than arthur expected, and he's touching him in ways he's never allowed anyone to touch him before. not even merlin would ever cross this line (though there have been times when he's been close, a hand smoothing arthur's shirt, fingers brushing through his hair during other nightly rituals, but there always remains a line, invisible and uncrossable). max isn't merlin, of course. what was he thinking? ]
[ it happens so fast arthur isn't even sure what he's supposed to do. which isn't to say he's unaccustomed to being kissed, but -- well, yes, one might say that he is. he's only ever kissed gwen, and it wasn't like this. it felt different, calmer, less like a fire in gut and more like being awoken from a pleasant dream. he's not entirely sure what that means. so he stands there, awkwardly stiff, his mouth only parting slightly near the end, when his brain finally catches up to the rest of him. he wouldn't really consider it kissing back. more like ... gaping in the middle of being kissed. ]
[ which is exactly his expression when max pulls away and goes back to looking at the lemurs. did he like it? he has no idea. he's still processing the fact that it happened at all. he can't even decide if he's mad or not. he still doesn't look at the lemurs, too busy staring bemusedly at max. he's probably never going to understand this. ]
You kissed me. [ thankfully, he sounds more incredulous than angry. and yes, it's obvious, but it's helping him process. sort of. saying it out loud makes it seem more real than it felt. he's just trying to work through this, and his mind is only full of an incoherent jumble of thoughts, mostly involving what it would be like to kiss merlin (and wondering why he's even thinking about that in the first place), so aloud is working better for him. ]
[ he hesitates for a moment, but then his voice goes slightly softer, almost as if he's ashamed, though he doesn't know what for. maybe just because ... he hasn't thought of gwen much, lately. since when did merlin become the forefront of his mind? arthur wonders if maybe he always was and gwen was simply a distraction. he hates to think of her like that. ] It was different than kissing Gwen. [ because he's going to be stuck on this kissing thing for a while. is that normal??? shouldn't kissing just be the same with anyone??? tell him these secrets, max. ]