GENERAL OPEN POST/IC INBOX/WHATEVER IDK

[burnination]

"Busy. Send a text."

[ that's right. it's been a decade and he still hasn't changed his voicemail message. ]

Comments

i will cheer u up 1/3

[despising]

I'm in America and I've got questions.

2/3

[despising]

What is with the fascination with bacon?

3/4 i lied

[despising]

What does "Y'all'd've" mean, I heard it in a conversation whilst stealing someone's wallet.

no i lied again one more. 4/5

[despising]

What the blue bloody fuck do Americans do with all these gallons of cold tea in their ASDAs? Do they pour it in the kettle? Do they microwave it?

ok im done

[despising]

Why do so many flavours of poptarts exist and which ones are good?

jfdkslfsa omfg bless

[burnination]

you realize i'm not american, right?

[burnination]

i was in alaska for five years, alaska barely counts as america

[burnination]

bacon: idefk. y'all'd've: you all would have. cold tea: what's an asda? poptarts: a - because they can b - strawberry, cherry and chocolate

[burnination]

you should be asking tris or marco these things

[despising]

No, Gunther, I wasn't aware, thanks for the new information.

I asked you because you're not American and you've witnessed whatever weird cultural differences these are.

[despising]

Honestly, I didn't know America had more states than like... Alaska, Florida, California, Texas and New York.

[despising]

ASDA is what you lot call Walmart. But you didn't answer what I'm supposed to do with a gallon of cold tea.

[despising]

I don't trust your American friends to explain American things to me.

[burnination]

i was nine when i left germany and i lived on a farm. im not sure what parts were different and what's just weird

[burnination]

that's all you really need to know, but take out alaska, no one cares about alaska

[burnination]

you're in the south, aren't you? you're not going to like the cold tea answer.

[burnination]

then don't be pissed if i tell you something wrong

[despising]

I only know about Alaska because of you lot.

[despising]

Wait, you were nine once? I want photos, have you got any? And you were a farmer?

[despising]

I'm in Georgia I think, that's the one by Florida, yeah? What has that got to do with anything? Why aren't I going to like it? Do you microwave it?

[despising]

I'll just add any wrong answers to the list of things that make up the "Günther is an idiot" list.

[burnination]

that's all there is to alaska. snow, bears and bcr.

[burnination]

i know, i didn't actually come out of the womb full grown and dashingly handsome, it's a miracle. my mom was a farmer, i was a boy that chased chickens around the yard.

i have one. [ attachment! ]

[burnination]

they drink it cold. it's called iced tea. i'm very sorry.

[burnination]

if i'm an idiot, why is it me you're looking to for answers?